Monday, October 24, 2005

Salvation

“To all those people doing lies, don’t do it. Inject your soul with liberty, it’s free.”

Today is the day that I have come up to my senses. I guess I’ve had enough of things that always wouldn’t go on my way. Yes, I understand that it’s normal, but for it to happen always, I think not.

My academics are frustrating. I must put an end to this for me to graduate by April. And I am definitely not willing to entertain the possibility of extending my schooling for one more semester. Enough of it, please! I’m begging You Dear God. I promise that I would be better. I’d change my old bad habits, I’d go to church every Thursdays and Sundays, I promise I would try my best not to miss a single mass, I would study harder, I’ll try to read ahead, I won’t cram, I’d make sure of my exam schedules, less time for my extra-curricular activities, and I would be Christian! Just please help me graduate.

How stupid of me to not understand my professor in Statistics 101 that we have a written exam on the 3rd of October and a take-home exam. All that I understood is that a written exam will be given on that day. Never it had cross our (Ozie as well) minds that there is a written exam too. So there you go, I took the exam without a lesson read and I got 18%. Worse, I got a grade of 4.0. Now I have 2 electives waiting for me to remove them. How I wish I’d pass them both coz I have 20 units to go and there’s no more space for another retake subject. Damn acads! Gone are the elementary and high school days when I was one of the few who excels in every field of all of our subjects in school. I should’ve never pursued chemical engineering in the first place. But I’d miss all the enjoyment that I got from it, especially KEM. Oh, I would definitely regret if I’m not a KEMer.

Speaking of KEM, this being my last semester as a Memcom VP would definitely give a bang for me. I would be a better officer this sem, and I’d promise I would play damn dirty and kick some ass. I’d also try to train my pips by changing the structure of the committee, giving jobs for everyone so as to train them as the future head of the committee. I wonder who would be my replacement. I hope it’s not this someone I know who has ulterior motive. You don’t deserve it. KEM needs someone better than you, so just be contented on what you have right now.

I’m living 22 years of my so-called life. I wish I had someone special already. I am ready to fall in love again, and I wish this time she could love me back. My past experience with Raia is slowly fading away, not that I could definitely forget all about it. I believe that there is nothing we can forget, especially when we talk about love, it’s only that memories and feelings just fade away, and we can not think about it anymore. There will always be a special place for you in my heart, and I have sung dozens of love songs. But now I truly accept that in this battle I am defeated, but the greatest regret is that I had never had a chance to tell my feelings, and I never had a chance to know yours. I guess the blame is all on me now.

Friends are the best therapists ever. I miss my old pals. I miss the Circle of Friends: Lorena, Paulyn, Limuel, Nanong, Gina, Prinz, Emma, Gemeni, Jen, Jhepe, Tin, Rizwan, Julie, Alpha, and my other high school berks. I miss my elementary days, back when I was still a member of the Magnificent 10: Nerwin, Marco, JC, Jeffrey, Edmar, Jules, Arjay, Gerald and Basil. I miss G2 peeps:KJ, Jurrel, Pepot, Jhovy, Rojan. I miss FLP4:Rox, Gidget, pH. I miss the old KEM Kada, way back when we were still 12: Maja, Mike, Angge, Rob, Mark, Steve, Menki, Pads, LP, Pol, Martin. It will never be complete again, at least for the longest time ever.

Whatever happened to you Lorena, you aren’t texting anymore. Is your life in Pasadena, California as great as here in the Philippines, Paulyn? Gemeni, you are very busy with your career, I can see that. Thank you Jen and Tin for the frequent texts. Are you already in France or still in Bicol, huh, Rizwan? Whatever happened to the Magnificent 10? I miss G2, we’re the best! It seems that I don’t know you anymore Rox, and you are my best friend. What did you do to your life? You wasted it. I hope you can compose yourself back again. I hope you can find a cure for you slight insensitivity Mike. But I promise I’ll try not to kid you anymore, you’re the closest male friend I got as of the moment. I miss the old times Rob, and it’s seemingly amazing that those times I’m pertaining to only happened this year. How time flies. We became friends and a few months later you had to leave. Things will definitely not be the same anymore when you come back, if you’d ever come back. There are things that happen every single day enough to change everything. But in a span of ten years I collected a great amount of treasure in you guys! Props to me.Ü

Define Salvation: Whether it’s a Divine Mercy (for academic miracles), rescue (from devilish acts), recovery (from heartbroken thoughts), or relief (from friends), we sure need salvation in a little deed or another.